"A castle that has been long besieged and is ready to be taken will deliver up on any terms to save their lives. He whose heart has been a garrison for the devil and has held out long in opposition against Christ, when once God has brought him to poverty of spirit and he sees himself damned without Christ, let God propound what articles He may, he will readily subscribe to them. "Lord, what will you have me to do?" — Thomas Watson

I wish I was there. But sadly, I'm not yet. I still fight God at every turn it seems.

It reminds me of the words from a song by Rich Mullins... "I'd rather fight You for something I don't really want, than take what You give that I need..."

"Father, I wish sometimes that You were not such a Gentleman. I wish that You didn't give me such freedom of choice... but I do understand, I suppose. ...If I didn't have the free choice whether or not to give up my idols -anything or anyone that I would hold in my heart more dearly than Yourself - then my love for You would be worth nothing; Forced love isn't love at all. Please continue to draw me to the place that I would give up (readily and gladly!) anything (Anything!) for my love of You. 'For no one can come unto Me, unless the Father Who sent Me draws them unto Me' (John 6:44) I know of a surety, and can say with the Apostle, "in me there dwelleth no good thing." (Romans 7:18) "prone to wander, Lord I feel it, prone to leave the God I love..." I am so glad that Christ is my All in All. In Him alone, it is finished.

"All for sin could not atone; Thou must save, and Thou alone.."

1. Rock of Ages, cleft for me,

let me hide myself in thee;

let the water and the blood,

from thy wounded side which flowed,

be of sin the double cure;

save from wrath and make me pure.

2. Not the labors of my hands

can fulfill thy law's commands;

could my zeal no respite know,

could my tears forever flow,

all for sin could not atone;

thou must save, and thou alone.

3. Nothing in my hand I bring,

simply to the cross I cling;

naked,come to thee for dress;

helpless, look to thee for grace;

foul, I to the fountain fly;

wash me, Savior, or I die.

4. While I draw this fleeting breath,

when mine eyes shall close in death,

when I soar to worlds unknown,

see thee on thy judgment throne,

Rock of Ages, cleft for me,

let me hide myself in thee.